Jerks

That's what my so-called-friends at work are. Jerks.

Perhaps you read the earlier post (I know you did, Col. E) about the Faux-Physicist's continuing campaign to annoy the crap out of me. Perhaps you care about the latest developements. If not, ignore this post.

GirlatWork and Bert conspired against me. The F-P gave his number to her, not to her to give to me, just to her. Well Bert suggested they pass it on to me. That's right chuckle it up jerk-faces. This explains things though. Of course, their hope was that I would be annoyed/pissed enough to verbally attack him, providing them with a great amount of entertainment especially seeing as how he would have no idea why I was mad at him. I feel so used.

If it wasn't so funny I might be mad.

Ahoy Matey

I am a Pirate



You are a Pirate

More Halloween pictures will be taken tomorrow. Yay for Halloween.

Oh, a btw: I was finally able to post. I drew a crapload this weekend so I've been posting them up there. There's new stuff at Help Wanted and Something Completely Different. Enjoy!

The Final Chapter Begins

Ok, so a couple of weeks ago I mentioned that a GirlatWork told me that one of my nemesi, the Faux-Physicist, has a thing for me. And you want to know the latest developements in that arena don't you? Sure you do.

Last Thursday and Friday he followed me all over the store. I went to the stock room, he went to the stockroom. I went up front, he went up front. It was not subtle. All my coworkers noticed and they all had a good laugh. (Hey, I've got a good sense of humor so it really doesn't bother me. He's the one who looks stupid). I was ignoring him Friday morning, kicking the empty boxes out of the way that he was leaving everywhere. I had my headphones on and he was like "Oh, uh, ah, I'm sorry. This stuff is in the way....Oh, can you here me?...Oh, I guess you can't hear me. Ok then." Idiot.

I have a little quiz for you.
If someone ignores your existance completely to the point of rudeness would you assume:
A. They despise the very sight of you and very much wish you'd stop talking to them.
B. They're just shy, but they really want to talk to you.
C. They're playing hard to get with you. You go, you sexy thing.
D. They never speak to you because it is taking all of their concentration not to rip off the both of your clothes and have sex with you right there on the spot because they want you soooo bad.
Yeah, it's probably "D", but we don't have to tell the Faux-Physicist that, he already knows. Of course it could be "C" or even "B" too.....

Yesterday I stopped in to work and the F-P happened to come sashaying in with his letter giving his 2-week notice (and there was much rejoicing, unanimously). This morning the GirlatWork came up to me and said "I'm sorry" as she handed me a slip of paper with the freaking Faux-Physicist's name and number on it! Can somebody get this guy a clue? Helloooo. We are not friends so there's no reason for you to try and keep in touch with me after you quit. And if this is some sort of lame way of asking me out by proxy I have one thing to say, "Grow a pair, will ya?"
It's not that I'm not flattered by his continued infatuation with me. I suppose that some might find that sort of tenacity endearing. I don't understand, it's like he's so oblivious that he's gone right out through the other side. Where do people like this come from?

There is only one thing I know: I am the Queen of the Wierdos. They love me and I. Can't. Make. Them. Stop.

It Figures

Of course, as soon as I have some material to post, Blogger starts being a brat. Therefore none of my drawings will be posted until the brattiness comes to an end. I am sorry, it's not my fault. But on the upside it really isn't my fault like I thought it was at first. Whew!

New data

It's official. I am a weirdo magnet.

Last night Colonel Eggroll, her husband, and I dressed up and went out to have a couple drinks in honor of Halloween approaching. Col. E and I dressed up as pirates. We went to one of our usual hangouts, Downtown, to drink. There we bumped into a couple of people we know, AndyM and the DrinkingBoy. We were glad to have Col.E's husband handy to stare down some weirdos in a line for Uptown who were ogling us.

Then after we had grabbed drinks and were parked on some stools and people watching this guy came up to us. I felt somebody's hand on my shoulder, we looked up and there was this guy there. He looked Lost Confused and was Incoherent, LCI-Guy.
Me: Hi
LCI-Guy says nothing, stares at us like he's waiting for us to say something. He stares down at my chest then looks back up and said: "Survivor?" (my head scarf did say survivor on it)
Me: No it's just my headband.
Col. E: We're Pirates...
He stared at us for a moment longer and then wandered off.
He came back a little while later. He stopped, leaned in and kissed my cheek.
LCI-Guy: I'm still mad at you.
Me: why?
LCI-Guy: *covers one eye* where's your eyepatch...mumble, mumble
And then he wandered off again. All we can figure is that the lack of eyepatches on our part confused him to the point where he could not tell what we were supposed to be dressed up as. Idiot. Even the DrinkingBoy knew what we were supposed to be and he was, in his own words, "Duhrunk".

Tell me how to get to...

I must have the look about me of someone who knows where things are and how to get to them. There are always people asking me for directions. Not that I mind, I just think it's interesting that they always pick me. And I try to give good directions. Although it has just occured to me that people always seem to take directions given to them, even by complete strangers, on faith that they are correct and will get them to their destination. I've never been tempted to lead anyone astray, but I wonder if there are people who give bad directions for shits and giggles. I don't know because I've never had to ask anybody for directions.

I feel the cure for getting lost is all proactive. Get a map and learn how to read it. I realize that females are stereotyped as being completely retarded when it comes to maps...and unfortunately I have found plenty of women who lend credibility to this belief. I am not one of them. I have always had a fascination with maps. When I was a kid I would sit around reading them. I guess I still am fascinated with them as I really enjoy the maps that authors draw/include with their books. Anyway, I'm getting off topic here, back to other people. I also think it would help if people knew the cardinal directions. I'm not saying that you need to know that such-and-such is 34 degrees Northwest by North of blahbliddiblah. Just the basics.

Now, my dad gives really good directions. Directions so good that they become too good. He provides innumerable landmarks. Him giving me directions sounds kind of like this->
My Dad: You're going to drive down 2nd street. There will be 3 stop signs, drive through those. Then there will be a stop light with a gas station on the corner.
Me: Do I turn there?
My Dad: No. Keep going.
Me: Okaaaay
My Dad: After that there will be a big, red barn on the left, turn there.
Me: What's the street called.
My Dad: Dunno, it's the one with the big, red barn on the corner. Anyway the place you want is a brick building three quarters of a mile down on the east side of the road. There's three yellow houses right before it.
Me: What's the house number?
My Dad: I think its 1538 or 1358. (Note: both my dad and I are slightly dyslexic) But there are three yellow houses right before it and if you get to the school, the railroad tracks, or the river you've gone to far.
(In this example the school would be a block too far, the railroad tracks would be about a mile too far, and the river is ten miles beyond the place I was looking for, in which case I would hope I was already aware I'd missed the place I was looking for)

Slacking off

Ok, so sometimes I procrastinate. Ok, sometimes I do it a lot. I've had the tool bar for weeks (or months), but finally got around to trying out Stumble Upon. A few clicks and I was hooked. Especially since I stumbled upon some good things right away. So I figured I'd share a few of my finds since I'm very busy procrastinating about the post I was going to write.


Unbalanced I love this animation. Dork that I am, I laughed so hard at this. What's not to love about violent stick figure animation?

Creep Some one put a lot of work into this awesome video to the Radiohead song.

End of the World I had seen this one before, but it's funny so I thought I'd share.

Icon War Some one was very, very bored while staring at their desktop screen.

Weekend Stuff

Last friday a group of us (Steve, Le, La, myself, K-Blue, and two of Le and La's friends N & H) drove up to Toledo to go play laser tag. It was really fun, although the driver of the lead car followed the directions of K-Blue's brother which took us about a half hour longer to get there then was necessary. Let it just be known that I ruled everyone (or pwned some noobs if you prefer). I was 2nd of 12 in the first game and 1st of 7 in the second game. Yes, I am totally deadly with a harmless laser gun.

My roommate, Steve , has created a blog. So introductions. Roommate, Steve, meet blog readers; blog readers meet roommate.

Monday night we celebrated that great rite of passage, La's 21st birthday. We hung out and Le and La's place until about twenty 'til midnight, since La couldn't get into the bars until after midnight. On our walk there it was drizzling, pleh. We popped into the first bar we came to to warm up and grab La a shot. Then we headed over to Downtown where we were eventually joined by Be-rad. Being a Monday and v. rainy we pretty much had the place to ourselves. The shots and drinks flowed, eventually taking us upstairs to Uptown because Monday's are '80's night. More drinks and shots and then we wound up on the dance floor. In spite of having six drinks in under 2 hours I didn't feel the least bit buzzed, I'm not sure where this tolerance came from. But even I indulged in a little singing and danceing, although nothing close to what La was doing. I told B-rad if he ever doubted his coolness he should remember this night, hanging out and putting up with 5 drunk (well I wasn't drunk) girls on '80's night, goofing around with us and what not.
Then we had to walk back. I believe 'like a motherfuck' would accurately describe how hard it was raining. B-rad gave La his jacket as we steered her along. We made it to B-rads to drop him off and warm up for a few minutes. Then we walked back to Le and La's apartment. Well Le walked with N and H b/c they were drunker than her. I walked La the rest of the way, which was pretty funny and definately my penance for having to be walked home myself this past summer on Col. Eggroll's birthday (a story for another time).
After dropping all of them off I walked the rest of the way home, making it about 3:30-3:45am when I got in. And that last leg of the journey was the worst. I had to walk in the open (not enough houses or trees) and the wind was blowing in my face. All told it's a little over a mile walk from the bars to my apartment and I apparently chose the clothes that have the highest water absorbency of anything I own. Don't be fooled, I had a good time, just a chilly walk home. Oh, we're planning on going out again this friday. Hopefully it won't be raining.

A Big Thank You

I just wanted to say thanks to everybody who's been reading my comic and to everybody who's given me feedback, suggestions and support. I really appreciate it. And thank you for all the compliments! More posts to come as soon as I have them ready.

Things I've Forgotten

Ok. So I completely forgot to mention that I went through with my plans to get a hair cut three weeks ago. I skipped my usual, a trim and some layers around the face and instead had 14 inches cut off of my hair. I decided I need a change, and you know what they say "go big or go home". I took a couple of photos in to my hairstylist and let her create. So now I have bangs and the shortest hair I've ever had. It went from the middle of my back to above my collar. Of course, with three weeks having past it's not that short anymore because my hair grows wicked fast. And it has this lazy curl/wave to it so it pretty much does whatever it wants, not necessarily what I want.

Here are some things from watching tv in the past week: I saw a preview for a movie called Flicka. It's the tale of some girl and her horse and some race, etc. How many variations of this same movie do we need to make? Also I saw a commercial for those beds that raise and lower at the feet and head. That's nice for other people, but I sleep on my side. Bastards. Does me no good. Also I saw an ad for both Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory and the newer Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I know I'm going to catch hell for this, but step into the circle of honesty with me here. I don't like either of them. Really. I read the book when I was a kid and loved it. I don't feel that either version really does the book justice or capture the feel of it.

Oh and in other news, the Faux-Physicist apparently has a thing for me. Wtf, I know, I know. One would tend to think that the fact that I never speak to him (or acknowlege his existance) unless he asks me a work related question that I cannot avoid answering would give him some kind of clue that I don't like him. However, the Faux-Physicist is very similar in behavior to some one else I've dealt with in the past, so I know the kind and how they think. The whole thing really is the past repeating itself. (The other, much to my surprise, also developed a thing for me.) This is how I found out.

Me: Nobody likes [Faux-Physicist]. I can't stand him. I came in the other day and he walked by and said *using a creepy elvis voice* 'ah, you looka verruh nice'. I didn't acknowledge him as he walked by continuing to stare at me until he had to turn away so he wouldn't run into anything.
Bert and RadishKing: *laughing*
Girl at Work: Oh well, you know he likes you.
Me: What?!? No he doesn't. *laughs*
GaW: No he does, really.
Me: You're joking.
GaW: No, I'm not.
Me: Good, because if you are we can't be friends anymore. *we all laugh*
GaW: See me and [Faux-Physicist] are kind of friends. It's totally obvious that he has a thing for you. I mean it's there for everybody to see. He's always trying to talk to you and follows you around and stuff.
Me: He does that to everyone.
GaW, Bert and RadishKing: No he doesn't.
GaW: The other day he asked me 'what do you think of [Winter]?' and I said 'I like [Winter]. She's cool.' and he said 'Yeah...'
Me: *whimper*

Huzzah -> Read on

Thanks to everybody who gave me advice and helped me decide on a name for my comic strip. The name I've decided to go with is "Help Wanted". I like it, and it kind of goes with the content.

Until I figure out how long it takes me to ink, scan and fiddle with the digital of the strip I won't make any promises on the frequency of posts. Although I have plenty of source material, 318 strips as of this evening, to draw from.

The images are kind of small, but you can click on them for a better view. Maybe not the sharpest yet (I'm learning as I go here), but the whole thing (including the lettering) is done by hand.

I've also posted an email in the sidebar so you can email me with questions or whatever. The first post is up, so go check it out:

Help Wanted [a comic]

Dilemmas

Halloween is approaching. Let's just be honest, Halloween has to be one of the best, if not the best holiday of them all. First of all, you get to dress up. Sweetness. And if you're like me you try to get as much out of this one holiday as possible. If I have more than one opportunity to dress up I try to have different costumes so I get as much milage out of Halloween as I can. And candy, everybody loves candy. Except for candy corn, which is not food. And just to top it off we get to go out and get drunk while dressed up.

So I need to get a costume together. I will be offered at least two opportunites to dress up. I have a pirate costume pretty much ready to go. So that's one, and if it all comes together well I might use it more than once because pirates are awesome. Other ideas include a robot (also cool), emo chick ( I might have to do this, I have some hilarious ideas), or making some cardboard armor and being a warrior babe.

Second dilemma, this is the big one.
I have two comic strips. I created a second blog for one Something Completely Different which is actually the side project. It's just a bunch of random one panel comics with no real theme. My other comic strip is my primary focus. I've been working on it for three years, I have hundreds of strips, and I want to start posting them. There's just one teensy tiny problem. I've been unable to come up with a name for it that I like. And this is kind of a big deal. I don't want to settle for something mediocre and then come up with something awesome a month later.

So I'm taking suggestions, especially from those of you that have actually seen my comic strip. For those of you that haven't, this is the premise. The main character, Beth (pretty much a more sarcastic and violent version of me), works in fast food and has to survive the trials and tribulations of that job. There are allies and enemies, friends with good intentions, gargoyles that live on the roof, occasionally a talking dog, and one very creepy coworker. Okay, that doesn't do it justice, but it's a start.

Help.

Live from the Living Room

That's right, I now have internet at home. I can now return to that happy land of paying my bills in my pajamas. Now I will only make my roommate wonder what I'm up to when I begin snickering whilst reading blogs instead of a computer lab full of complete strangers. Hopefully I will be able to pry myself away at a decent time and get some sleep tonight, but we'll see.